3 Things You Can Do Today to Tackle Your Stress
Whether we like it or not, stress is contagious. Our kids are always watching, and even subconsciously — thanks to mirror neurons — are picking up on our emotions, our stress, and how we handle these things. That can be a really intimidating reality, but thankfully, not completely out of our control.
When our oldest was an infant, I was really stressed about an upcoming trip and, to top it all off, the baby was a wreck. So unlike her usual happy self, she was extra fussy and clingy and I was losing my mind trying to get everything done while needing to attend to her even more.
It wasn’t until my mom reminded me that babies pick up on our emotions that I realized the baby was fussy and clingy because I was a mess. Oof. It was like a bucket of cold water poured on my head.
I started intentionally trying to calm myself down over the next few days and — I kid you not — her behavior improved dramatically. Looking back, with 2 more kids and 11 years of parenting experience, it seems like a no-brainer, but in the moment it was revolutionary.
Demand vs. Capacity
I recently did a talk for a lovely group of moms about our kids and stress and it was another bucket of cold water moment for me. (If you’d like my notes and bonus info from that talk, you can request it here!) As I shared about what triggers stress in our kids and how we can support them, I kept coming back to the importance of how we handle our own stress.
One of the first things I recommend when trying to address your own stress is to re-define it. My favorite definition of stress is: what happens in the gap between demand and capacity.
How can you decrease some of the demands in your life? How can you increase your capacity to handle those demands? We can look at this for our kids, too. Where might they need a decrease in demand (fewer activities, less pressure about school etc.) or an increase in capacity (more down time, snuggles etc.)?
Sunshine and Movement
We can over-complicate things so much. Never underestimate the power of simply getting some fresh air and moving your body when you’re stressed out.
Getting fresh air, whether or not it’s sunny, is so helpful. Research tells us that being in nature can help reduce cortisol (one of our stress hormones). Oftentimes, too, just the act of taking action — getting outside — can make us feel more calm and in control.
Same goes for moving our bodies. You don’t have to go for a run or do a long workout. Do a few jumping jacks, swing your arms back and forth in front of you, go up and down your stairs a few times. Getting your blood pumping helps snap your brain out of it’s stress state so you can access the rational, thinking part of your brain.
One Thing Not To Forget
I’d be remiss if I didn’t stress — pun intended! — the importance of prayer in all this. How much of our stress comes from a desire to be in control? Yet we know that ultimately everything is in God’s hands. It’s easy to know that intellectually, and a whole different story to actually live trusting that God will take care of everything.
As you look at your demand and capacity, as you model helpful behaviors like getting outside or moving your body, as you make these little shifts for your sake and for the sake of your kids, don’t forget to pray about it.
“Trust in the LORD with all your heart,
on your own intelligence do not rely;
In all your ways be mindful of him,
and he will make straight your paths.”
Let’s Do Something About This Together
Once a quarter I run my free Healthy Habits Reset. The next Reset starts on April 29th and for this Reset I’ll be incorporating some of the stress mastery techniques I teach into these healthy habits. Regardless of what habit/s you’re focusing on, these moments of calm will help you tackle the next thing with more peace and more ease.
Each morning of the 10 days, I’ll share a stress mastery hack or we’ll practice one together in the virtual group. I’m really excited to add this intentionality to the daily messages! I’m always working on better handling my own stress, so I know the extra accountability will be good for me, too. So, what are you waiting for? Join us for 10 days of intentional focus health goals that you get to choose and come away with some new stress management tools, too!
